Humor: News from unusual suspects

Another video tape from Abu Grahaib has surfaced and is in the hands of Senator Barbara Boxer (Comm. CA). Senator Boxer showed the tape to unbiased reporters from The New York Times, Al Jazeera, and Socialist World. Reports the Times:

The tape clearly shows Corporal Don Slyke confronting a helpless but smiling racial minority prisoner who is playfully advancing upon him with what might be a knife. Corporal Slyke sadistically grabs the prisoner, and using an illegal judo hold that is clearly forbidden by the French and German military, spins the prisoner against the wall and then forces the knife hand in a position so that the knife went into the anus of the helpless prisoner. Corporal Slyke is clearly heard saying "Give up, towel head or I'll see that for the rest of your life you'll cut your fingers every time you wipe your worthless Muslim ass."

A clearly angry press corps and a sobbing Ms. Boxer vowed an investigation into the racist comments made by Corporal Slyke claiming that they were authorized by people at the very top of the Government. In a related story, Hamas announced their support for John Kerry in Novermber.