I have long wondered why this totally gorgeous piece of ass ain't no movie star. OK OK, as most of you know, the girl is super porn queen Jenna Jamison. So I'm over at a pal's house and we are ranting about great looking girls, when I once again pose the "why isn't she?" question. My pal went over to his Tapes/CD cabinet and rummaged around for a few seconds and came away flashing a tape. He ran it down and then slowed it. What he had was a short TV interview with her. Think "Singin'in the Rain," think of the plot, then think of Jean Hagen as the silent screen favorite, Lina Lamont; she of the absolutely horrible speaking voice. No, no, not Jenna. Yes, yes Jenna. She has the most narrow speaking range you can imagine, meaning that she always speaks in the same boring two note monotone and sounds as sleepy (and stupid) as you can imagine. No matter how gorgeous, if you got a voice that sounds like it's coming from the depths of a sparrow's diaphram, you are fucked. My pal, an acting teacher, says he runs the dam tape about once every two months as an example of why young people similarly cursed better take speech therapy before it's too late.