12/17/2006

Why a lot of us don't like musicals: because they stink. Forty years of glancing at the old Hollywood output of roaring boring song fests on TV featuring no story, no acting, and bad actors stupidly breaking out in song for no reason at all; forty years of it have taken its toll on human indulgence. Even the tolerably good ones are hard to take except for the excerpts. I particularly single out "On the Town" (Kelly, Sinatra, Ann Miller) as an example: some decent songs, some great dancing (particularly by Miller---Jesus, was she great or what?), and not much else to rave about. Movies like "That's Entertainment" give us all we can stomach of those stupid fucking musicals. The genre only lasted twenty years or so before sinking rather quickly into the West, vanishing mostly because of lousy stories and the high school play level acting. Examples: the only conceivable reason to watch Kiss Me Kate is Ann Miller, which means it is 90 minutes of perfectly awful shit just to get to ten minutes of greatness; West Side Story, which is about homosexual white gangs in New York singing and dancing to terrific music that leaves us with about ten minutes of stuff without guys in tight pants wiggling their asses at us and displaying acting that is somewhere between a cold reading level and worse than that; all the Rooney Garland stuff, in fact all of the Garland stuff; and and and. So the entire output leaves a bad taste in a new audience's mouth. Dreamgirls will flop, not because of racism as will be declared by all the usual suspects, but because the musical movie is dead.

4 comments:

Xiaoding said...

Again, you leave out "South Park"! Only good musical ever made! Proving people WILL go to musicals, as long as the songs are about uncle fucking!

boarwild said...

have to disagree with you on two counts; the Astaire-Rogers musicals of the 1930's are tremendous, simply stories of boy-meets-girl-loses girl-wins girl-back backed with the Gershwin/Jerome Kern scores can't be beat.

and "A Hard Day's Night"; that stands the test of time. no, The Beatles weren't great actors but they didn't have to be. they were playing themselves.

Howard said...

You can go to any garbage dump and if you sift through the refuse you will discover one item of value. Would you suggest that everyone sit around looking at garbage dumps in the hope you will see someone you don't know dump a diamond ring into the pile? Singin' in the Rain is great, but how many musicals of 1951 were even worth looking at? Mario Lanza's singing voice was always worth the $2 to hear, but the fucking movies he made were just barely literate. I'm just saying that people under the age of 40 have had it with entire genre' and people under 25 find them so phony they can't give them a chance.

Anonymous said...

I always found them phony. Musicals are chick entertainment. Most heterosexual men are at them only to make their S.O.'s happy.