It made perfect sense. My indoor plants had leaves turning yellow and much new growth had browning leaves. I went to the plant lady (actually this woman I used to screw) and asked her for advice. In candor, I must admit that I am always aware that if you show a woman you need help desperately your chances of getting laid improve exponentially, but I really did want to fix my plants. Too.

"Are you using tap water, Sweetie," she asked with her eyes looking deep into mine.

"Yeah. What the fuck else," said I romantically.

"The chlorine in the water is death to everything including plants. Death. You must use purified water. Your plants will recover and grow."

I left her apartment two days later and bought some purified water which I proceded to use on my plants. There was some improvement but then they reverted to their old evil ways. I thought they might need more light, meaning artificial light, so I surfed the net. At one of the hydrophonic sites I discovered the cure. It was a fertilizer with a 7-9-5 make up that isn't available anywhere other than hydrophonic plant stores. When I read the label it told about all the minerals and stuff that was in it---and then it dawned on me. When I started feeding my plants purified water I deprived them of the very minerals they needed.

Another whacked out Hollywood Liberal who is a hell of a lay but full of shit plantwise. The evils of chlorine, Right to Life, and Republicans almost murdered my plants. With a clear conscience.